Every Sunday, on the stroke of midday, Kev comes up and we share a glass of cider. I supply the cider and Kev usually brings a bottle of wine, so I get the better half of the bargain.
Couple of weeks ago he says, I’ve got something a bit different for you – a haggis.
Fortunately it wasn’t alive and had been plucked, de-boned, minced and stuffed into a sort of synthetic skin ready to be boiled. Put it in the fridge.
Didn’t want to do the traditional Burns Night thing with tatties and neeps, a borrowed kilt and a dodgy Scottish accent.
So, first off, I invented Haggis Huevos Rancheros – corn tortillas covered with enchilada sauce, thick fried slices of haggis, topped with fried eggs.
Got to say this came out pretty good and got us through about two thirds of the beast.
Well, that’s pissed off the Scots, Texans and Mexicans. Lets have a go at the Italians.
The answer to most culinary questions is – a pizza.
I know a lot of people are distainful of the dustbin approach to pizza but it can be a very delicious way of using up scraps. Just needs a snappy name in French or Italian to boost its appeal. Don’t think Food-Waste Flatbread really does it.
This one had a thin crust more because of the consistency of the dough than by design. Made a break for freedom while I was transfering it to a baking sheet and you can’t unstretch dough …
Five minutes in a hot oven (300C). Then a layer of burrata.
The burrata had been in the fridge since before Christmas and the packaging was blown up like a balloon – had to stab it with a sharp knife, hoping it wouldn’t spurt everywhere. Never mind use-by dates, that’s why God gave us noses.
When God was handing out noses I thought he said roses and I said “give me a big red one” – Jimmy Durante
The next layer was a melange (sounds better than “a hash”) of chopped haggis, Somerset cider chorizo, an aging chicken drumstick and left-over belly pork plus a few mushrooms – fried and then drained of fat.
After the application of a very artistic lattice of simple tomato sauce, it went back in the oven for about 20 minutes. Then a healthy amount of parmesan and a good sprinkle of oregano for a final minute in the oven.
Never a pineapple around when you need one …
The PArtisan Baker 